February Funnies: My Top 10 "Jenius" Moments

Oh teaching…there never was a job more frustrating…or more fun.

And some of the best stories come from middle and high school classrooms. That's why several secondary bloggers are linking up this week to share some of our funniest classroom moments with you!

Throughout the years that I've spent in the classroom, I have religiously kept a journal, a “Jenius Journal.” It is oh so full of “jenius” moments from my classroom. Tonight I will share a few entries that don’t quite qualify as genius, but they definitely make the “jenius” cut!

I have created a top 10 list of my classroom “jenius” moments, so here goes:

10. Once, when my 10^th grade world history class was studying the Reformation, one of my students asked me, “Who was that guy who posted the 95 feces?”

9. One of my 11^th grade U.S. history students said during the 2008 presidential elections, “Barack Obama can’t be president—he was born in Hawaii, not the U.S.”

8. I accidentally told a group of 8^th grade English students, as an example of hyperbole, “I’m so hungry, I could eat a whore.” Oops…meant to say horse. The class was lost for the rest of the block.

7. A student vomited all over his desk at 8:30 AM—I felt horrible for him, until I discovered he had had copious amounts of vodka and orange juice for breakfast.

6. A student asked, “Ms. Cleary, when will we ever use this in life?” while I was reviewing proper hand-washing techniques to prevent the spread of flu.

5. I busted a student cheating on a quiz, and he responded, “Don’t you want me to get a good grade?”

4. Over the years, students have laughed every time our vocabulary word has been “assassin,” “Shiite,” or “Hellenistic”—every. time.

3. I still can’t draw the U.S. Southeast on the board without it looking inappropriate. Giggles fly around the classroom. Never again, I always think.

2. One of my seniors came back from the restroom, after turning in two freshmen for throwing toilet paper all around the boys’ room. I was so proud of him because he had chastised them, saying, “You need to respect your school, man.” A while later one of the principals came to get him. The freshmen had retaliated by informing the administrator that my student had been in the boy’s room vaping. They got detention—my senior was suspended.

And the number 1 “jenius” moment in my career thus far….

1.       A student at our rival high school got in-school-suspension. He emailed a bomb threat from his own account to get out of it—the school is pressing charges.

What are your funniest teaching moments? Leave a comment below to let me know! And don’t forget to check out the fantastically funny stories from the amazing teachers linked up here!

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